Our Girls…

What we do to our Girls

I have a beautiful friend, and am not talking of the sort of ‘beauty’ that we merely mention as a blanket adjective to stand in for our lack in creative, descriptive jargons for the women around us. I mean smack hot! Smooth skin that would challenge even silk for a cling, a perfectly rounded bum that would make silly good old me stare in awe as she walked past or by or around or even stood! Hell she just standing. P.s: I am not a creature of one body part. She is the kind of girl you would gladly hide away in your palace as you go out to conquer for grapes, chocolate and what nots. She is a family friend, her mom calls me son and also saw her go through school so smashing is out of the ‘kweshen’ thanks to my high levels of integrity.

Our little princess here has always been spoilt and nagging, to the level that if she wasn’t we’d rush her to hospital. The level of compliments lining up on her way rivaled works by the great Michelangelo, and all was well with the world. I don’t really know whatever changed but definitely she grew into her curves perfectly, her hair grew longer and legs longer, her smile ever more seductive, she became sexy and something came with it.

 

“I want a wealthy man to date…..” she would utter,

“Why would you need such?” I would mask the jab to my heart.

“I will get enough for rent and food.”

That would end so emphatically I would be lost for a point to start my Inquisition. Apparently at home sentiments have turned against her, she has now ceased to be adorable she was now an embarrassment, ceased to be beautiful and now slutty. She explains how her folks wouldn’t tolerate her now that she has grown up.

 

She explains how she has found herself worthless before the eyes of those she relied upon, forced to fend for a future she has only dreamt about without back up. The only valuable items she is sure of possessing is her unquestionable beauty. Since her high school results came out, not having met the threshold to join university, the verdict was out! Her beauty corrupted her completely!

 

So I seat and watch her manoeuvre calls and texts of several suitors, vetting and vetting with a sense of urgency only she would understand.

 

Did I mention I once saw a potential ‘suitor’?? Were it not for my civil ways I would have skinned somebody and gladly walked myself into Kamiti.

 

I wouldn’t want to delve too much in an autobiography but this is a tale we know all too well, a tale we have nationally agreed and allowed to define us. Seems our soviety hasn’t learnt the female species, granted they are impossible to learn but these aren’t the intricacies of what colour is what of what shade of lipstick(balm) matches with what skin tone(natural or otherwise). This is the basic niceness those around our girls portray towards them as they grow!

 

I haven’t had the fortune to raise one to adulthood what I have seen in my time though is that it is hard to raise one with proper ideals in a world set to sell the improper as mainstream, especially with girls’ affinity for such triviality.

My thoughts; every society has come to learn that loving the female species is the only sure way to a healthy, successful and thriving nation. You can trace this in a lot of the phrases past down for centuries (still maintaining meaning) traded in comedy shows and in bars.

 

‘Happy wife, happy home’

‘She is always right, unless when she says she is wrong, in such case she is right!’

‘A mother knows’

‘Send a woman to negotiate’

‘Where is your mother?’

Etc (I could go on)

 

Peering through our nation we have a tendancy to accuse, shame and vilify our women for the simple things that happen, whether they are in control of said items or not.

We call them proud when they flaunt their beauty.

We call them slutty when they are friendly.

We accuse them of laziness when they rest.

We call them prostitutes when they date.

 

Consider a recent event playing out right on our faces; Jacque Maribe’s case. Ever wondered why the whole hullabaloo on Maribe’s cosy and supportive father. Why would the whole nation be bewildered on his actions, his dedication to his daughter and all. I bring you a theory, weigh it for a moment : we are conditioned to vilify girls who engage in relations in a way we have not pre-anticipated, we snare at public display of affection even between lovers.

We overly judge girls according to the men they are associated with, but never the same for men. So in this case we saw a man, a father who loved and supported the daughter even after she was romantically involved with a man, but not yet married.

We saw a man who looked at his daughter and chose not to judge but love her, decided not to accuse but to embrace her. This was so baffling to our minds that we couldn’t pin point why the case was so alluring every night. This only goes to show how foreign that kind of unconditional affection is to our girls.

Picture a mother’s wailing for her son in court would be.

Or a mother protecting her daughter after she was involved in a sultry relationship??

 

Think about it.